PARASTOU BARTLEY

5 THINGS  I WASN'T EXPECTING ABOUT MOTHERHOOD

5/17/2016

4 Comments

 
not sure if i'm just #hormotional or what (as i sit here trying to keep my eyes open after my first day back at the office) but motherhood is a raw beauty. i love my son. i love being a mother to my son. i love having someone who needs me just as much as i need him. but this role is not always easy. i've only been in this tribe for 16 weeks & i'm still learning. not everything is as perfect as mommy bloggers & instamoms share. here are few things i've recognized that haven't been so glamorous...
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1 // postpartum sucks. from all the other moms i've indirectly surveyed, the results are unanimous. it really sucks. from physical recovery, an unrecognizable body & the reality of not knowing what you are doing is overwhelming. i've told friends i'd rather be preggo again than endure the ten days after birth. not being able to sit straight, wearing heavy pads & suffering from sleep deprivation is a formula for a midnight cry or three. but it gets better. i promise.

2 // returning to work is incredibly hard. to the stay-at-home-moms, treasure your opportunity & don't you dare be ashamed. i'm shocked when i hear some moms having to "explain" or "justify" why they didn't return to work. lucky you! enjoy it. i'm one day in & was an emotional mess as soon as i got home. granted, i pray things will get easier & i'm thankful eliott is being babysat by my mom but it's hard. i was genuinely surprised on how emotional i was. i really thought i could bounce back into the swing of things. not so much. i guess you can't really prepare yourself...rather trust that you know (or will know) what's best for your family.

3 // sometimes you're picked last. or not at all. if you think the girl world can get competitive (style, weddings, careers, etc), you're in for a real treat in the mommy world. missing out on playdates, dinners or group trips will happen. don't feel like you're not enough or not liked. however, learn to instead take the initiative & build community yourself. don't be afraid to pursue others!

4 // it's a love/hate relationship with your body. i look back on my preggo photos & am in awe of how large my belly was. how did i carry that weight?! God is one heck of a Creator, allowing the female body to experience childbearing. what a crazy & wonderful experience. but let's be real, the extra weight lingering months later is so frustrating. i've said multiple times, it doesn't matter if you gained 15 or 50 pounds, every mama has the right to feel frustrated with their pre-preggo jeans feeling snug. & if you don't? i salute you/tell me your secret.

5 // your friendships change, sometimes disappear. being unsure as to why friends are rarely texting you to see how you're doing, let alone come visit you...but have the time to visit other moms & their babies. yup, i said it & i admit, it does cross my mind. everyone is busy, i totally get it. i guess for me, it puts into perspective how i can be a better friend to someone in my shoes. they say if you want to see who your genuine friends are, have a baby. don't forget to appreciate & express gratitude to your friends who are taking the time to show you they are thinking of you. side note: never overlook family. they will be the only people you can 101% rely on. don't take them for granted.

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i would like to reiterate again, motherhood is a raw beauty. i'm so grateful to be in it. i hope if any mamas out can relate to any of the above sentiments, they know they are not alone. anything to add to the list?
4 Comments
Pegah
5/18/2016 07:23:38 pm

you have the right to be emotional but what is my excuse?! lol! lightweight crying. you're so inspirational sas! I can't even imagine how your first few days back at work feels like but I know you + your strong work ethic so you'll continue to do amazing! eliott is truly one blessed boy!! love you guys!

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parastou
5/20/2016 09:16:16 pm

thanks sas 💕

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Natalia
5/25/2016 09:59:01 pm

Yeah so I basically agree a million percent with all 5.
Numbers 3 & 5 hit me REALLY hard... I felt like I was missing out on everything and it took a lot of crying and encouragement for me to gain some perspective. Looks like you persevere SO fast! And as far as returning to work goes... looks like I'll be calling you for some hardcore encouragement when that arrives in January. Going back to work (or school) in my case wasn't as tough because Josh was 9 months when I went back part-time and over a year when I went back full-time. Still hard, but maybe a little less difficult. This time, it won't be an option to return so late :/ anyway, LOVE YOU. these are the best. keep writing.

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parastou
5/26/2016 09:52:57 pm

I'm glad I'm not alone. it's definitely been hard returning to work but prayer & support from family & friends have helped so much. you'll be strong BUT it's so far away, enjoy your time now ❤️ love YOU!

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